May 18, 2017

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How To Ask A Girl Out

How To Ask A Girl Out

How To Ask A Girl Out

So you’ve met a woman you like. Maybe it was at work, or through a friend.  Maybe you’ve developed a friendship with her, or maybe she works at the coffee shop and you’ve never really spoke to her for more than a few moments.  In any case, you like her and you want to make a move, how do you do it?

From a guy’s perspective, asking a woman on a date can be a risky move. What if she says no? What if it gets awkward? What if it ruins the friendship? These are real fears, but not as much of an issue as you may think. The truth is that asking a girl out isn’t difficult or even risky if you know how to do it properly.  So how do you do that? 

1. Don’t over think it!

Guys make asking a woman out a huge over-complicated problem. They think about how exactly they’re going to word it, when they’re going to do it, and what they’re going to ask them to do. They get all inside their head, and then when they finally do ask, they’re so full of nerves that women get awkward and it kills any attraction she might have had for them.

Here’s the thing: women want a guy who has options, a guy who is choosing her because she’s better than all the rest, not because she’s his only option. A guy who has a lot of options obviously  goes on a lot of dates, and because of that they’re not a big deal to him.

You need to ask women on a date the same way you ask your best friend if he wants to come over to play video games, or grab a drink. It’s no big deal.

Remember: You’re not asking her “Do you like me?” you’re asking “Do you want to spend some time together?” There’s a big difference.

2. Don’t use labels.

Avoid saying things like “Would you like to go on a date with me?”. There are some women and certain situations where the brazen approach would communicate a certain romanticism and get you points, but it’s mostly going to hurt you if you start applying labels.

Women know that when they agree to a “date” that there are certain expectations that men tend to have about what might happen. For instance, “is he going to try to kiss me? What if it’s awkward and I want to leave early? What are we supposed to talk about? Do I offer to pay?” This can create some apprehension about going out and they may cancel or refuse the date because they’re simply not sure if they’re OK with these things. It’s best to make it simple, try these:

“Hey I’d love to grab a drink with you, are you free tonight?”
“You’re hilarious, we need to hang out, I want to sing karaoke with you.”
“We need to eat nachos together. I know the best place in the city for nachos, they’re going to blow your mind. Are you free tonight?”

Which brings me to my next point.

3. Make it low-investment

Most guys know that a dinner and a movie makes a pretty bad first date. Who wants to eat and then sit in darkness for 2 hours not talking with a person they don’t really know? The problem is that a lot of other “great” first date ideas are actually terrible as well.

The point of the first date should be getting to know each other. Any date that features an activity that becomes the focus instead of talking to each other is not an ideal first date.


Invite her out for a drink, take her to a (public) karaoke bar, or even a walk through an interesting area, these are all good low-key date ideas. The problem with fancy dinners, movies and concerts is that they’re difficult to connect over and a bit presumptuous.

4. Fortune favours the bold

It’s very difficult to get a woman to go on a date with you when she already knows you well and considers you a friend. Even if she does agree, odds are you’re so entrenched into the “friend zone” with her that the date will simply be a fun night out with a friend instead of an opportunity to build a relationship.

You should ask women out on a date when you first start to like them and before you know them too well. The date should be the reason to get to know them better! This way it frames your interest going forward as something that isn’t simply friendly.

5. Make a move

Don’t be afraid to admit your intentions about the meetup. If she coyly asks you “Is this a date?” confidently smile and say “Absolutely”. If she asks why you want to go for a drink with her, smile and say “Because I think you’re interesting and I’d like to get to know you better.”

Make sure you choose a spot to go that has good logistics so that if the date goes well things can progress better. Booths don’t work well, opt for small tables with seats to be closer to her.

Learn Exactly How To Ask A Girl Out Here

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