June 24, 2010


Savoy on How to be a Player at Comic-Con | Maxim

If you roll out of bed wearing superhero getup, you probably don't have much to look forward to outside of Thor issue 10 and/or a new World of Warcraft expansion pack. Maxim contacted love guru extraordinaire Savoy, CEO of Love Systems, to get the lowdown on making your trip to Comic-Con in San Diego the sex-riddled excursion it was meant to be.

Maxim: Who are you?

Savoy: I teach men how to succeed with women.

M: How does one get started helping guys make sexy time with women?

S: This is a phenomenon that started off in the late 90s, with the Internet, various discussion boards, and chat rooms. When I moved back to California for my career, I ended up meeting a lot of these people, kind of randomly, and getting more and more curious. I realized, "Wow, this stuff really can be taught."

M: Did you have to develop these skills, too? Or were you a player from the start?

S: No, definitely. I'm the furthest thing from a natural. I had the most to learn. I'm still learning. I mean, we're only scratching the surface of human psychology and social dynamics. If anybody thinks they've got all the answers at this point, they're crazy.

M: Why do gamers generally strike out?

S: Well for gamers, it can be a very closed community at times. One of the first rules is: You're not going to meet a women unless youapproach a woman. You need to get out to bars and restaurants and lounges, or some place where there are women that you're interested in.

M: So do you think somebody looking for a woman from within the gaming community is limiting themselves?

S: If you're interested in a woman that's into gaming, and a lot of guys are, that's definitely do-able. But remember that because of the gender ratio, women have more social value in the gaming community. A woman who may not get a ton of attention in her regular life may get a ton when the ratio is 90 percent men.

M: How do you differentiate yourself?

S: It doesn't have to be a huge thing—just by having the confidence to approach a girl already puts you vastly ahead. A specific technique that's key is something that we call disqualification. In the first few minutes of meeting a women, you should do or say something that implies you're not hitting on her, at least not from a standpoint of strength. For example, don't say "Hey, I'm not hitting on you, I'm just coming over to ask you…" That's just weak. Talk to her, tease her a bit the same way you may tease your little sister. It shows that you're not afraid of her and, most importantly, that you're not putting her on a pedestal because that can get old very quickly.

M: How much of this skill is learned and how much of it is innate?

S: I don't think that's a distinction. Some people are clearly natural, and a lot of what we've done is reverse engineered that naturalness. I mean this definitly can be learned; all of our instructors are former students for the most part.

M: So, what would you say is one of the biggest mistakes that gamers make?

S: A lot of guys tend to be too logical and linear. You shouldn't go up to them and wonder how do you sleep with her or how do you date her. You're always trying to first accomplish the approach, which is getting the confrontation started. The next is attraction, that's getting her interested in you, before qualification, where you make her earn your interest in her. You shouldn't be worried with what you'll be doing hours from now; you're just trying to accomplish the goals in the next 10 minutes. A gaming analogy is you're not trying to solve the whole game in the first few moments of playing—you're just trying to get to the next level.

M: Say you approach a girl and gave a bad opening impression. What would be a better alternative?

S: There are six different kinds of what we call "openings." For example, an opinion opener

would be asking a woman and/or her friends (you always have to address the whole group) their opinion on something quirky, like saying you're planning a surprise birthday party for one of your friends and asking if you should do an 80s theme or jungle theme? It doesn't matter what the actual question is—it's really just a matter of being able to start a conversation, something that will generate more than a yes or no response. If you ask, "Where you from?" they'll say, "Orange County." By the third question, the answer is going to include the word "boyfriend" somewhere.

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Nick Savoy
Nick Savoy


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