Most men, when they first start with Love Systems, think that they are better on dates than they really are. It's natural to feel this way. Maybe you have approach anxiety, maybe you're not great at attraction, but if a woman agrees to go on a date with you, things usually go well enough. Right? Does this describe you?
It used to describe me. And it's a trap. Because once you use Love Systems to attract more desirable women, your "old" date game won't be good enough anymore. You can wear a garbage bag and sandals to McDonald's, and it will be fine. But if you bring that outfit to a quality restaurant, you'll be turned away. Same thing with women - when you start dating more desirable women, your date game has to step up too.
So, without further ado:
Mistake #1: Setting the wrong goals (or no goals)
Why are you going on a date with her? Maybe you are still getting to know her, but assuming that she passes your tests or you've already decided you like her, then presumably you want to sleep with her and/or be in some sort of relationship with her.
And as we've covered a million times at Love Systems, no matter what kind of relationship you want with a woman, your medium-term goal is to start a sexual relationship with her. It's far easier for you to become her boyfriend (if that's what you want and you know what you're doing) if you're already sleeping with her than if you're the guy who is "dating and waiting". So, your goal on a date with a woman you like is to sleep with her, or move closer in that direction. That means escalating physically.
This might sound obvious but it's very different from how most actually date. Most men spend the entire date being a talking head, and then hope for the kiss at the doorstep. Instead, accelerate this. Touch early and touch often. Kiss her during the date, at an emotional high point. It doesn't need to be a long makeout, just establish that you two are kissing and that's OK. Once you've already had the kiss (ideally a few over the course of the date), then you're in position for the end of the night for the stakes to be much higher than a goodnight kiss.
Mistake #2: Getting the logistics wrong
Logistics, in Love Systems, essentially means "where are you and who are you with?" Usually a date is an opportunity to improve logistics. If you meet her when she's with all her friends about to leave the bar in 5 minutes, you're not going to have much of a chance to progress too far. That's really one of the big reasons why we date at all - because when you see her again, the logistics should be better: you will (presumably) be just the two of you, you won't be stressed for time, and so on.
So if the point of a date is to improve your logistics, you may as well get them right. Work backwards. If you want to hook up with her, you need the end of the night to be at your place (ideally) or at hers. Together. So don't plan a date where you each have to take separate cars to get somewhere. Don't plan a date where you're doing something together where the two of you live in opposite directions from (or it will be really awkward to invite her home). Don't invite her best friend to tag along. And so on.
One great logistical tool - especially if she's driving - is to have her come to you for the beginning of the date. Then take her out somewhere. At the end of the night, where does she have to go? (at least to get her car) Your place. At that point, it's a very simple matter to invite her in "for a second".
Mistake #3: Failure to lead. And plan.
So, you have a date with a woman you like tonight. That's great. You'll show up, see what she's in the mood for, and then figure out what to do then, right?
Wrong. Seriously. Have a plan. Women think that's sexy.
That doesn't mean being a caveman and ignoring her wishes. But instead of "I don't care what we do; what do you want to do?" it's more like "there's a comedy show around the corner I want to take you to; sound good?" If she doesn't want to do what you suggest, she'll let you know.
Have a backup plan. Let's say you were planning to get dessert after the show, but she's not in the mood. It's much better to say "cool, there's a really interesting wine bar down the street, let's go there instead" than "oh geez, well, what do you want to do instead?"
Women tend to be attracted to a man who is confident, in control, and can make things happen. So you never want her to see you flustered or unsure of yourself. "Always act like everything is going according to plan". Don't be frustrated by the traffic or complain about the weather.
Today’s blog post features a story and excellent advice from former Love Systems Instructor Bonsai. I had a...
You spend an hour getting ready to go out. Maybe two, counting travel time. Maybe you review your copy of the Magi...
There’s nothing worse than getting put into the friend zone by a girl you like. Instead of dating her, you have becom...
© 2018 Love Systems, Inc. · 1-800-680-0821