December 08, 2013

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5 Places to Meet Women that really work

Where are the best places to meet women? Some men make this more complicated than it needs to be. There are actually only five kinds of places worth talking about:

  1. Bars and Clubs
  2. Day Game
  3. Online
  4. Through people you know (aka Social Circle game)
  5. Warm Approach (places where you might not know anyone, but you have a reason to meet them, like a conference or a class)

There are books or DVDs for each of the first four places (Magic Bullets for bars and clubs, Daytime Dating for day game, Gentleman's Guide to Online Dating for online, and Social Circle Mastery for social circle game).

But we haven't talked about warm approach for a while, so let's take at some examples:

1. Dance classes

Most dance classes will have more women than men. And these women will generally have their lives together - it takes a little more life organization to find and show up for dance classes regularly than it does to go to a club on Saturday night.

But it's not just the ratio. You're forced into interacting 1-1 with other people in the class as you dance with them. Dance is a form of foreplay. Plus, there'll probably be lots of touching. People who touch each other remember each other better and more positively.

Dance classes are usually ongoing, so there isn't pressure like at a club or in day game to make things happen right away or lose your chance forever.

Even if you don't meet any women who you're attracted to at dance class, it's still not a waste. Befriend the attractive women who are there and meet their friends (using Social Circle Mastery). You're developing a skill that is extremely useful when meeting other women. If you can show a woman you met how to salsa - confidently leading her, guiding her, showing her something new, making her feel sexy and glamorous - well, that's an almost unfair advantage.

And if that's not enough, you're developing an interesting hobby to talk to women about and getting some exercise.

2. Meetup Groups

Meetup groups can be fun, but don't just go to the "singles" events. Just like speed dating or lock-and-key parties, you're not usually going to find the most attractive or desirable women there.

Instead, check out the zillions of random events and groups - book readings, park cleanups, concerts, Russian food festivals, art house screenings, etc. Whatever you happen to be interested in, there's a meetup group for it. These will put you in the path of women who you don't normally meet and who you have something in common with. This makes it really easy to start the conversation.

Getting out of your comfort zone and doing new and random things will benefit you in other ways too. For example, you'll have more varied and interesting experiences to share with other women you meet, as well as a broader social circle.

3. Improv/acting classes

These are a no-brainer, like dance classes. The male/female ratio isn’t as skewed, but lots of young, attractive women want to be actresses or are interested in the stage, and you’re forced to get to know each other and interact. If you take classes for a while, you’ll probably end up putting on (small) shows that you can invite women to.

Acting skills also help your body language and non-verbal communication a lot. If all actors did was read a script, anyone could do it. What makes acting difficult is conveying layers of emotion and meaning through their body language, tone, facial expressions, and so on. These are incredibly valuable skills, and why the two stars of Beyond Words: The Body Language and Physical Escalation Home Study Course (Derek Cajun and Daniel Vercetti) are both trained actors themselves. (See Reviews of Beyond Words here)

Improv classes in particular are useful for helping you think on your feet. If you sometimes find yourself “running out of things to say” when meeting women, improv can help develop those muscles.

4. Adult Sports Leagues

Many cities have co-ed (men and women together) sports leagues. Most of these aren’t too serious; they’re mostly excuses to get together, have a drink, run around a bit, and have fun. (Sports like basketball and soccer are often more competitive and less social; sports like kickball, dodgeball, or softball are often friendlier and more social).

The women who go to these will usually be young and in-shape. A lot of the time, they’ll be there at least in part to socialize and meet guys. And usually everyone will go for a drink afterward. If not, be the one to suggest it.

In addition you get some fresh air and exercise, and you can say things like “I have a game Thursday night” (at least until you smile and tell her it’s just dodgeball…)

Bonus: Karaoke, Concerts, Trivia Nights, etc

These are more of a cross between a bar or a club and a warm approach situation. Most of the warm approach examples in this piece are regular, ongoing things where you’re almost “forced” to meet each other. In contrast, karaoke night or trivia night at your local bar, or a live concert, is more of a one-shot deal when people aren’t forced to meet each other. But they’re still more like warm approach than a typical nightclub. There’s a more social feel, you already have things in common, women aren’t getting hit on by other men as much, etc. They’re usually good opportunities to explore.

How to get better at Warm Approach

It’s hard to be good at warm approach if you’re not good at social circle game. Even though they are different, they rely on similar skills. So the first thing I would definitely recommend is Social Circle Mastery, featuring Nick Braddock.

 


Nick Savoy
Nick Savoy

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