Every guy wants to be able to attract women. But let's be honest, some guys seem to have it easy when it comes to attracting women, while other guys (me included) always wind up in second place (or third, or fourth).
When I was younger, it drove me crazy. I wanted to know "what do these guys have that I don't have?" Of course, some of them were good looking, tall, rich and sophisticated - so it was obvious why women would go after these guys. But just as often, I knew guys who were pretty plain, badly dressed, short and out of shape - and they STILL seemed to have this ability to attract women that I didn't have.
I'm not the kind of person who accepts mediocrity, so I started to research, and I read everything I could get my hands on about attraction, psychology and sexuality. The stuff I learned would fill a thousand blog posts, but I'll share the seven most important things I have learned right here. If you read this page, and watch the videos, I promise you that you will get knowledge that took me YEARS to learn. And if you like it, please share it with your friends and social network.
The first thing you need to understand is that attraction works differently for women than it does for men. Some of you might say "that's obvious", but knowing exactly what the differences are is extremely important. Once you understand how attraction works from a female perspective, you'll find it much easier to create attraction, and to avoid destroying it. Or at least, when you screw up, you will know what you did wrong.
Here's a video where I explain the secret of attraction and how attraction in women differs from attraction in men. I recommend you watch it in full because there are some interesting examples at the end.
Once you really start to understand the secret of attraction, suddenly the problem of how to attract women becomes much easier to solve. This is one of those things that guys who really get women understand, and average guys struggle with.
Instead of asking her of questions like “where are you from” and “what do you do for fun,” make a definitive statement or a cold read. For example, say “you have a New York vibe” or “you must be a lawyer.” This is a terrific method to prevent the conversation from turning into a boring interview. Try to practice this tactic the next time you're in a bar because it's a crucial behavioral component to attract women. We use a lot of techniques to help guys improve their conversational skills (trigger words is just one).
The idea that women like confident men is almost a cliche, but it's true. Confidence is a valuable in every element of your life, but never more so than in dating. A confident tennis player might play better and more aggressively than an unconfident tennis player, but at the end of the day, he's judged by how many points he scores in the court. But on a date, a man is judged first by his confidence, and only later by any other factors. And most importantly, confidence is learnable. Check out this blog post on The Real Secret Of Confidence if you want to go into more depth on confidence and how to really develop it naturally.
It's great that you have a nice car and a great job, but don't tell her that directly. Although women are attracted to wealth, they are not attracted to men who brag about it. The reason behind this is that women can sense that a tendency to brag likely stems from low confidence. Instead of bragging, tell her an interesting story that allows her to decipher independently that you're successful.
Relax your shoulders and put your weight on one leg. Lean comfortably against a wall or the bar if possible. Most important of all, hold your drink to your side, not in front of you. Men have a tendency to hold their drinks firmly in front of their stomachs. This creates an artificial barrier between you and the woman and hinders your ability to attract her. If you can incorporate these suggestions, you will come across as a much more confident and desirable person.
Attraction isn't just in the mind, it comes from a bit of adrenaline, and excitement. So you can create attraction simply by doing exciting things together (even if the conversation is a bit slow!)
I explain it in detail in this video.
Lesson #7: Women love to role play
Indulge her appetite for fantasy by making her your personal bodyguard and telling her to protect you from the other girls across the bar. Or pretend that you are engaged and then break up with her when she says something that you don't like. Tease her and tell her that if she makes up for it, you might take her back.
Learning how to attract women takes time and dedication, but in the end it's an extremely important skill to develop. Taking the time to work on this element of your life doesn't just lead to fun times with new women at bars and nightclubs, it also leads to better relationships, a better family and a better life down the road.
If you're interested in learning more about how to attract women, I recommend signing up for the Love Systems Insider - our weekly newsletter with the best dating tips from the world's top dating coaches. Or share this with your friends via the sidebar!