Love Systems gives average guys the tools to meet and attract women. Especially women who you don’t know, whether you see her at a bar, on the dance floor, at a park, or just walking down the street. That’s how we got our start 10 years ago – taking guys to these places and teaching them how to pickup girls or whatever beautiful women happened to be there.
But sometimes it’s not about meeting someone new. Sometimes you’re trying to attract a woman whom you already know. Maybe even someone who has rejected you already. How do you turn this around? Let’s look at a couple different situations:
Most men who are trying to turn a friend into more hope that being a nice, sweet guy makes her realize one day that he’s want she really wanted all along. Just like in the movies.
Except it never works in real life when you want to get out of the friend zone.
Girls turn guys down for many reasons. But when a woman says that she sees someone as “just a friend,” that usually means that he’s too much of a “nice guy” for her to feel anything romantic or sexual for him. Being even “nicer” isn’t going to help.
(IMPORTANT -- the opposite of a “nice guy” isn’t an “asshole” or a “jerk.” This is an easy mistake to make, a lot of men make it. Instead, learn how to be more confident and challenging. This is the foundation for Love Systems.)
Become the man she wants, but not right away. This is especially important if you want to learn how to attract high quality women. If you change your behavior to a woman immediately after she rejects you, then you’ll come off as petulant or pouty instead of confident or challenging. Instead, get out of her life for a couple months, work on yourself and your skills with women, and then come back as a different person – as the type of man she really wants.
Alright, I know I’m going to get abuse for this. Love Systems takes a lot of criticism for giving men the tools to “steal” wives or girlfriends.
But the issue is actually more complex this than. One of the insights in my Relationship Management DVD course (which covers getting into and managing traditional relationships, open relationships, friends with benefits and everything in-between) when it comes to how to get women is that women don’t cheat just because certain men cross their path. If a woman is going to cheat – and you can tell this well before you get into a relationship with her if you know what you’re looking for – it will have much more to do with her inherent personality, as well as the quality of your relationship with her, than it does with what opportunities come her way.
We don’t teach how to undermine a boyfriend, but the reality is that a lot of the most beautiful women are rarely single, and if you don’t meet them when they’re in a relationship, you won’t be there when the breakup happens. If she has a boyfriend, what do you do if you want to make her like you?
Some women just reflexively answer that they have a boyfriend – because they don’t want to feel unattractive or unwanted, or to see if that makes you back off. Others do have someone fulfilling at least aspects of a boyfriend-type role in her life, but are looking for something better. And others – yes, others might be open to cheating if your pursue them. This is all part of understanding female psychology.
The good news is that you don’t have to figure out what’s going through her head. It will become obvious eventually. In the meantime, the best advice here is also the simplest – do nothing different. Don’t talk about her boyfriend, and change the subject if he comes up. Or, if you’re feeling particularly ballsy, try this (courtesy of Love Systems instructor Future Thompson):
MAN: Bleh bleh bleh bleh
WOMAN: I have a boyfriend
MAN: Oh, that’s cool. Does he treat you nice?
MAN: [Playfully]. I wouldn’t. (And then immediately carry on to another topic)
If you've done a good job of attracting women, she’ll laugh or playfully hit you when you say that. This dialogue shows her that this isn’t the first time you’ve run up against a boyfriend and that the situation doesn’t intimidate you. In other words, that you are a high-value man.
(This comes from Volume 2 of the Routines Manual).
If you go up to a girl and she says something like “keep walking” before you even open your mouth, know that she isn’t rejecting you (she can’t; she doesn’t know you). She is playing some adolescent power games and hasn’t yet figured out that high school is over.
Oh, and you can probably still get with her if you want to. To learn how to pick up the ice princess, don’t fall into her frame. Don’t get upset. Treat it like a joke. Check this out, from Love Systems instructor “Venture”:
MAN: Bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh
WOMAN: Fuck off.
MAN: Oh, I love this game! [Pausing, thinking] – OK, I got one. You’re a fucking bitch!
This doesn’t work if you’ve really done something to offend her. But it works very well if she blows you out for no reason.
(If you like these examples of word-for-word things that instructors actually say and do, check out the Routines Manual and the companion Routines Manual volume 2. The longer and more personal routines shouldn’t just be copied straight “out of the box” – you’ll get the girl, but it’s not authentic – but they’re great as examples that you can translate into your own life.)
In general, if a woman doesn’t like you right away, don’t sweat it. If you act unconcerned and secure in the knowledge that you do have a lot to offer, she’s more likely to come around – and other women watching will be much more likely to be attracted. Enjoy!
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