October 25, 2009


There Are Two Kinds of Men in the World - You Need to Be One of Those Who "Get It"

Guys who understand women get to play by a different set of rules.  My good friend TD used to call this being part of the “secret society” but it’s not a secret if you know what to look for.  Men who are part of this club don’t take any interaction with an individual woman too seriously, don’t want to put some women on a pedestal and hold them to expectations of nun-like purity, and aren’t judgmental about women who enjoy their sexuality.  And women will let such men get away with things they’d never find acceptable in other guys – or in the same guy before he “got it.”  

I’ll explain with an example – one that also lends itself to tangents about picking up 9s and 10s, and threesomes.  So, hold on tight.  

A few years ago, a friend introduced me to “Karen,” then one of the top up-and-coming fashion designers in Los Angeles.  At the time, I was only just starting to piece together the secrets of meeting and dating beautiful women - the techniques that I later revealed in my book Magic Bullets and now form the basis for Love Systems’ teaching worldwide.  But, with some difficulty, I was able to date and then seduce her.  She might even have been my first “10.”  

During this time, Karen’s behavior was pretty typical of a beautiful young woman dating an average guy.  She resisted my advances at first and made me work.  She didn’t sleep with me right away.  She didn’t seem especially sexual (without being a prude). She claimed to have no interest in threesomes and told me she’d only been with six men in her life.  She was... “normal.”  I did finally close the deal on the third date and we dated for a while after that, but because we both traveled all the time, we never got to see each other and ended up as casual friends.  

(Which actually worked out great, because hot fashion designers have hot friends and hot models they work with.  Using a precursor to the game-changing techniques designed by Samurai and Braddock in their Social Circle Mastery program, I worked my way into a great position in her social circle and have hooked up with a few of her friends – we’ll get to why this is important in a moment.)  

Fast forward to last weekend.  I was teaching an advanced bootcamp at the Playboy Mansion.  The main event was this big fashion show, and a student and I interrupted our debriefing to watch.  We saw the most unreal girl walk the runway – the 2nd most beautiful woman I’ve ever met in Los Angeles.  Tall, perfect body, beautiful face, perfect skin (I’m a sucker for perfect skin) and that long soft straight blonde hair I love so much.  And a walk that conveyed complete confidence and intense sexuality.  She was not only a 10, she defined 10s.  We’ll call her Lara.  

The student wanted me to pick her up.  I wanted me to pick her up.  I could feel the whole Love Systems community wanting me to pick her up.  Okay, maybe that’s going too far.  Let’s just say that the vodka from the Playboy Mansion open bar also wanted me to pick her up.  But I did relish the challenge - captivating the obvious star runway model in the center of the Playboy Mansion grounds surrounded by cameras and... because there’s no other way to put it... hordes of horny dudes.  Those guys did NOT want me to pick her up.  

The mechanics of the pickup actually weren’t all that different from any of the countless pickups that happen every night around the world using the Magic Bullets model.  Since most members of the Love Systems insider are already familiar with this foundational book, I won’t go over the basic mechanics; I’ll just cover a couple of the twists and turns.

First off, I don’t like to approach the “star of the show” head-on.  An actress signing autographs, a model getting photographed, a singer coming off-stage, these women are already surrounded with men sucking up to them.  I like to rebound into conversations with women in these situations.  In this case, I started talking to two guys who were among the many surrounding her.  And then when the moment was right (she just finished a conversation), I pivoted to her as if I’d been arguing with these two guys about something, and jumped straight into a shortened version of LBD’s text message breakup opinion opener from the Love Systems Routines Manual Volume 1.  Yes, the humble opinion opener – which I still use.  With everything on the line, and guys spending $5,000+ to learn dating science from me live at the Playboy Mansion, I trusted in the same scripts anyone can get for $99 with the Love Systems Routines Manual Volume 1 (or Volume 2).  

If you’ve read Magic Bullets, you know what came next.  I knew I wouldn’t have much time, and had to race to at least get to the Comfort phase of my 7-step Emotional Progression Model (part of the newly unveiled Triad System).  This meant getting quickly through the Transition, Attraction, and Qualification phases.  It wasn’t easy, because guys were interrupting us every 2.4 seconds and when she started leaning in to me to show she was attracted, one of her girlfriends came over to “rescue” her.  Meanwhile, one of her manager people was trying to move her to somewhere else she supposedly needed to be.  Taking her home was going to mean work, if it was even possible, and I had students to get back to.  So I got her phone number, arranged to have a drink with her the next night, and left.  

Here’s where the lessons come in.  A guy who didn’t “get it” – who took every woman seriously when he first met her, who didn’t understand how female psychology and sexual decision-making worked would have taken her on a traditional date, hoping to get somewhere by the end of the night.  No problem with dates – I use them when I don’t have a better option – but I knew I only had one shot with her (they’d only brought her in from New York for the show) and wanted to seal the deal in the one night I knew we’d have together.  

I invited a bunch of my friends (ah, the joy of mass text messages) to a bustling outdoor bar/cafe that would have great social energy, drinks, and food (i.e., no excuses to have to go somewhere else).  I invited mostly girls, but also brought one of the students from the Advanced Bootcamp along.  He was doing individualized training with me the next day, so I figured he may as well observe the night before too.    

One of the girls who showed up was Karen, who I hadn’t seen in six months.  I must have texted her 10 times in the past six months with no response.  A guy who doesn’t have girls might have gotten frustrated or deleted her number.  To me, it didn’t matter.  I still thought she was cool, even if she was busy or not answering, and it doesn’t cost me anything to keep inviting her.  So when she showed up, there was no “edge” – no under-the-surface wondering why she hadn’t been responding before.  I was just happy to have her as part of my night and enjoy the moment without worrying about the past or the future.  That’s what guys who have women do.  

Lara was still the woman I was interested in.  Karen and I had hooked up enough times before; I could take it or leave it.  Whenever I am in a group situation with my friends and a woman I am interested in, I follow the same pattern (WRITE THIS DOWN):  

  • Put the girl you’re interested in beside you.
  • All the touching goes to her (ideally under the table).
  • All the conversation goes to everyone else.  

Lara was resisting my under the table touching at first.  When did she start reciprocating?  About five minutes after she realized that I’d hooked up with both of the other women at the table.  Don’t confuse this with Pre-selection.  Pre-selection is an attraction switch – one of the eight revealed in Magic Bullets - but I was well past Attraction at this point.  No, what this conveyed was that I was a guy who had women in my life and that I “get it.”  I wasn’t jealous or controlling with the girls I’ve hooked up with.  I just enjoyed their company, and they mine.  Even though Karen and I were having boiling sexual tension, both of the other women looked on in approval as Lara and I started connecting physically.  

After a while of that, I sealed the deal when I leaned in to whisper in her ear:  

Me: What kind of women are you attracted to? [I’d already established that she has hooked up with women in the past.]

Lara: [Lists some qualities]

Me: What do you think of Karen?

Lara: She’s beautiful... etc.

Me: Well, no promises, but I’ll see if I can convince her to join us when we go home later.

I want to make this clear – up to this point we’d never kissed, never really talked about sex, and certainly never discussed going home and having sex that night.  But when she passively accepted the frame that I set with the last line above, the question changed from “where is this going tonight?” to “will this be a regular hookup tonight or will it be a threesome?”  

It’s similar – but far more effective – to when I used to joke around with women on dates about whether the night was going to end with us having sex once or twice.  Either choice I win, and even said jokingly, as long as she doesn’t object, it helps establish the frame.  

It seems like a little thing, but it’s not.  As I always emphasize when I teach, the dividing line between a woman sleeping with you or not sleeping with you can be exceedingly narrow. Lara was fully intending to have a drink with me, flirt, maybe kiss a bit, but leave it at that. This changed the game.  

Once I’d told Lara that I’d try to get Karen home with us, I fortified that frame a couple of times with “no promises, but I’ll see what I can do.”  And then of course I started shifting my attention to Karen, who had seen Lara clearly into me and me responding, etc.  After I had made out with her, Karen said the punch line that is the reason why I wrote this article in the first place:  

“I love you because you’re such a whore.”  

I don’t know if it was just because I’d gone from heavy touching with Lara to making out with her – without embarrassment – or because I’d hooked up with her friends (and been discreet enough never to mention it to her... she found out from them, not me), or just because I was conveying that attitude, but it was interesting because Karen changed at that moment.  

Gone was the woman who had been more or less typical with me up to that point.  Now she was openly talking about her sexual experiences, letting me touch her in public in ways that I had had to struggle to do in private before, etc., etc.  It’s not that Karen changed.  It’s that in her mind, I’d changed.  I’d gone from a cool, fun, but normal guy in her mind to a guy that has women.  

  • Guys who have women in their life are safe.  They won’t freak out when a woman doesn’t call back or has to cancel.
  • Guys who have women in their life aren’t jealous or controlling.
  • Guys who have women in their life aren’t judgmental.  They understand that women are complex and multi-dimensional and can’t simply be labeled virgins or whores.

Look, I’m going to be straight with you here.  You’re not going to be having threesomes with two 10s as soon as you read Magic Bullets and the Routines Manual and solve your sticking points with the relevant instant downloads from the Love Systems Interview Series. You will need to practice, and it will take some time to integrate it all.  (Or you could just come to a bootcamp which makes it a lot quicker.)  

But what I will say is this: There’s nothing in this particular pickup that wasn’t taught, corrected, and practiced in detail at the bootcamp.  I know this because I was I teaching it – and all Love Systems lead instructors teach that material in their programs. There’s also nothing in that pickup that isn’t in Magic Bullets , the Love Systems Routines Manual , or a couple of key interviews.  

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Bill Quaintance
Bill Quaintance


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