October 10, 2009

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Can You Get Caught Using Pickup Lines?

Mailbag

We usually keep in touch with former bootcamp clients on the Love Systems lounge. That’s like our continuing education program except it’s free (and if you haven’t been to a bootcamp, you can’t buy your way in; we want to keep the level of discussion high).
 
But that doesn’t really help for the mailbag. So, a former bootcamp client Jeff was kind enough to let us repost our conversation here for the entire list. Small edits have been made to protect Jeff’s identity.
 

Dear Savoy,

I don’t know if you can answer this or if it’s a dumb question or whatever. I took a bootcamp with Braddock and The Don about a month ago. I know it’s been said millions of times, but it truly has been life-changing. I travel a lot for work and in the last 4 weeks I have met (and “closed”) four different women in four different cities. Before my bootcamp, I would have thought that they were all out of my league. It’s funny – when you know what to do, you stop thinking any girl is unattainable.

I expected to date more and better women, but I didn’t expect how having this area of my life handled would help the rest of my life... friends, work, family, etc. Everything seems easier when you got laid the night before.

Now I’m about to head home for about two months, and I know this might sound stupid but I am wondering if I use Love Systems in my hometown whether people might catch on? Should I save this for when I’m on the road?

- Jeff D., El Paso, TX

 

Hey Jeff,

Go ahead and use Love Systems in your hometown. Use it anywhere. If you’re doing it right, it’s impossible for anyone to know. This isn’t because we’re so clever that we can hide anything, but because the very nature of Love Systems means you don’t have to try.

No woman in the world is going to say something like:

  • “You’re so interesting and exciting... did you learn Love Systems?”

  • “You have confident body language... you must have learned that somewhere.”

  • “You approached, then transitioned, then attracted, then built qualification and comfort all while smoothly escalating physically and logistically and now I’m really into you... Love Systems??”

Love Systems is not a bunch of secret spells and code words. Love Systems is reverse-engineering what successful guys do, breaking it down, taking the best parts, applying it to your individual identity, and then building on that with our own testing.

This difference is important.

Let’s say you’re learning to cook Italian food. You’d start by looking at the best Italian chefs, recipes, and cookbooks. To be a great chef, you’ll add your own originality and twists on things, but you are still cooking recognizable dishes.

When a woman sits down to eat, she won’t say “This is weird. Are you trying to copy that guy on that cooking show?” because what she’s getting is good quality Italian food that she recognizes. She’s had this before. She likes it. It’s what she wants.

This is just like when a guy uses Love Systems. He is giving her the same feelings she likes and knows when she is unbelievably attracted to a guy.

BUT...

Let’s say you DO go off in an entirely new direction. Maybe it’s molecular gastronomy, or weird ingredients, or tastes she’s never heard of or that don’t fit together.

It’s like having some “secret spell” for seduction. It’s unfamiliar, it’s weird, it may not fit, and it definitely puts her on her guard and makes her feel weird.

And every night I go out, at least one of my female friends will point to some guy and say, “he’s trying to be a pick up artist.” And she’s usually right, usually because the guy is trying to do something that doesn’t fit or is weird.

THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT THIS IS REALLY EASY TO AVOID. Follow these three easy rules:

  1. Don’t dress like a weirdo

  2. Don’t talk like a weirdo

  3. Remember the story of Sam

1) Don’t dress like a weirdo

The way you dress is a choice. Women look at your clothes to see how you have chosen to present yourself.

If you present yourself as someone who looks weird and thinks every day is Halloween, the odds will be stacked against you.

I don’t care who you’ve seen on TV dressing like a weirdo. They’re on TV and you’re not. Anyway, TV isn’t real.

Now, Jeff, I know that you know this because you would have gotten first-rate personalized fashion consultation as part of your bootcamp. But for everyone else, dress in a way that expresses your identity. Whether your identity is a hotshot lawyer, club promoter, or outdoorsy guy, dress in a way that conveys and reflects that.

Wear at least one thing that gives a woman an excuse to approach you or compliment you. Even if she was attracted to you, she can’t come over and say “I love your Gap khaki pants.” She CAN say she likes your shoes, ring, shirt, jacket, etc. So, help her approach you.

Personally, I usually go with relatively plain (but fashionable) jeans and shirts, and then do something a little more interesting with my shoes, coat, or watch.

But that does NOT mean “more is better.” This is NOT time for “seventeen pieces of flair.” Don’t dress in a way that would embarrass you if you ran into your boss.

(See, if you would be embarrassed running into someone you know because of how you’re dressed, what chance do you have of her wanting to be seen with you and running into someone SHE knows?)

There are some examples of fashionable dressing (including before and after photos) in my downloadable eBook, Magic Bullets. You can also see how some of the top pick up artists in the world today dress on the Love Systems YouTube Channel.

2) Don’t talk like a weirdo

I was a consultant to a TV show that was on a while ago on which a bunch of guys learned some pick up techniques and then they were filmed going out to clubs.

(It’s a fun show, but it feels too staged for my tastes. I prefer the raw pick up video from Keys to the VIP.)

When it aired, I think some viewers thought that they were watching private bootcamp video instead of a TV show available to anyone, because I started hearing guys everywhere using the exact same lines. And, women recognize them.

That’s why at your bootcamp we worked on personal routines for you. (If you’re not familiar with the term, a routine is kind of like a mini-script.) These include exactly what you should say and do to use your individual identity and tastes to attract beautiful women.

What you might not know is that we also regularly review and update the Love Systems Routines Manual. It’s got 200 pages of word-for-word scripts, when and how to use each one, and how to make your own. Add in all the variations and customizable routines and you could probably use its routines for a year and never repeat yourself.

So, we make sure that none of the routines have fallen into popular consciousness, and we update the book when necessary. In fact, we’re sending out an updated version of Volume 1 of the Routines Manual in the next week. This is at no cost to anyone who has a previous version. We always like to keep our stuff fresh.

Similarly, the Love Systems Routines Manual Volume 2 (which is a separate book with all-new advanced content) has had each routine checked for up-to-date usability.

Point being, if you’re going to use someone else’s routine, use one from a book designed for this, not from a TV show lots of people have seen and discussed. Anyway, the whole point of the Routines Manuals is that you learn to come up with your own routines fluidly and naturally – that’s why we give away all of the tools to do so.

3) Remember the story of Sam

I was training a man who we’ll call Sam at a bootcamp last summer, who was one of the less experienced men in the group.

He was in his late twenties, had been single most of his life, and had never really been with anyone more attractive than the proverbial cute-girl-next-door.

In the daytime (classroom and practice) part of the bootcamp, he got up to speed. I could see that he’d be firing on all cylinders both nights we went out.

But... the transformation wasn’t 100% complete. Talking to two beautiful model-types (both almost a foot taller than him in their heels), he was about 70% the alpha male who routinely attracted such women and 30% the shy guy he had been before the bootcamp.

It’s kind of like languages. If I am speaking English to you but occasionally throw in a word in French, it’s not a big deal. You’ll usually get what the word means from the context, and so you don’t really stop and think about it.

But, if one out of every three words is French, you’ll lose the flow of the conversation. You’ll think: “this guy doesn’t actually speak English fluently.”

It was the same with Sam. He smoothly got their phone numbers, expertly got the woman he was most interested in alone with him on the patio...

... And then he started throwing in some cringe-inducing, low-value behavior from his old days.

In other words, the transformation from “being yourself” to “being your best self” wasn’t complete.

Though neither woman brought it up, I wouldn’t have been shocked if either of them had asked him whether he’d studied Love Systems.

Now, don’t worry about Sam. Sam ended up okay. The next night, he took home a cute college girl. The next week he was with some other hottie. And just recently he sent me an email to say he’d met the girl of his dreams and he’s getting married.

Some guys use Love Systems to be players, some to live the rock star lifestyle with threesomes and models, and some want better options and not to have to settle any more. It’s all good. You pick the mountain; we help you climb it.

The moral of the story is that if you’re improving quickly, there may be an awkward couple of weeks. Women may react to you like you would if you were coaching a sports team and all of a sudden this little out-of-shape kid shows up and is your best player. You’d notice. You’d think: “I like this, but something doesn’t fit quite right.”

All this means is that you’re getting better. Give it another couple of weeks and you’ll be fine.


Nick Savoy
Nick Savoy

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