March 04, 2008


Be More Social and In the Moment

By Moxie

Want to know the best way to get into a good state of mind for meeting women? The answer is to have fun!

The best way I find to get in state is by going out with a wingman and just have an awesome fun time! When I'm out with my wing we are always laughing and having fun and the women are just a natural progression of the night and it's not a big deal.

To be honest I'm usually in state before I enter the first venue. How? I'm always doing a combination of one or more of the following things: laughing, joking, witty banter and word play, singing, play wrestling with my wing, opening sets, and more. Even getting blown out is funny and can put me into state if I've done something particularly ballsy, which the silly girl was too reserved to appreciate.

State Killers

Now having said that I want to draw attention to things that can kill your getting into state. If you have a cheat sheet add these state killers on the back of it. If you find yourself making the mistakes below (I know I sure have) just stop it, say to yourself: "Damn, I'm doing X bad thing. Whoops, that's not going to help me. Cool, good thing I noticed - look there's a group of people I haven't met yet! Hey guys!"

State Killer 1: Doing WWII reconnaissance laps around the club looking for "the hot girls" as opposed to just going up to the first people you see and starting to chat with them for a fun social interaction.

State Killer 2: Talking about game. This is lame. Seriously, don't do it; you'll just get inside of your head. This includes discussing potential sets with your wingman - that's also lame. Just go up and approach; you don't need your wingman to give his rubber stamp of approval to enter a set. That's just your approach anxiety playing games with you.

State Killer 3: Doing the same things - using the same old opener and routines without trying to do something new. For example, try going in direct and use a new routine you haven't tried a million times before - or no routines - mix it up a bit.

State Killer 4: Seeing a set you want to approach and making a lame excuse about why you won't go and approach them which you know you don't really believe. These can include: they are too fat, they are on the dance floor, they are about to leave, etc.

State Killer 5: Going to the bathroom before you speak to people first - you'll just make it harder to get into state.

State Killer 6: Ordering a drink before you speak to people first - you'll just get in your head and it'll seem weirder and weirder to approach people.

State Killer 7: Going up to sets without the attitude that you're going for glory and just approaching because you're forcing yourself to. This game is fun, truly fun; if you are just approaching so you can tell yourself you overcame your approach anxiety and have done your ten sets for the night, that's totally lame. I mean, props for approaching but go for glory, push it as far as you can and get the girl, and/or learn something so you can build on your success!

Related Posts

Nick Savoy
Nick Savoy


Leave a comment

Comments will be approved before showing up.