Is how you dress affecting your chances of hooking up?
First Impressions: A Love Systems Approach
When it goes to attracting beautiful women, there’s good news and bad news.
The good news is that being good looking for a guy is much more about fashion and grooming than it is about what you look like with your shirt off. 99% of men can look good enough (with the right knowledge and a few hours at the mall) that your looks won’t stop even the hottest women from being potentially interested in you.
The bad news is that looks aren’t nearly as important to women as they are to men. A beautiful woman often doesn’t have to do anything to get men interested. A good-looking guy still needs to attract women with social intelligence, pre-selection, status, humor, and so on – the usual Love Systems techniques. Looks help a bit, but usually all they do is help from being rejected straight out of the gate for being bad looking.
Here’s some of the key points, sourced from the notorious worldwide encyclopedia of Love Systems – the award-winning book Magic Bullets:
What Women Think
- When you first start interacting with a woman, she won’t know much about you. She will look at what you’re wearing and make assumptions about you.
- These assumptions often come from stereotypes from movies or TV and are inevitable. The way you dress is a choice and she knows this. Based on your outfit & grooming, she may think you are any of: boring, wild, rich, lazy, fun, high-status, try-hard, artistic, sexy, generic, etc. All before you say a word to her. See how Love Systems does everything it can to tilt the playing field in your favor?
- Pre-judgments are inevitable. Just because you didn’t put any thought into your outfit doesn’t mean she won’t think about what your outfit means about you. Always convey the identity you want people to see.
The Rules of Dressing
- Wear one or two interesting items that stand out a bit – not only does this convey that you’re different and more confident from the thousands of men who have approached her before, but it also gives her an excuse to approach or compliment you!
- Only break one or two “fashion rules”. This shows you dress the way you do as a choice – not because you don’t know any better. For example, I wear suits a lot for business, but if I’m planning to go out after, I might combine it with cowboy boots, an unusual belt, or an attention-getting neck chain. (The book Magic Bullets has before- and after- pictures in the fashion chapter).
- Take a woman shopping with you to judge cut and fit. But DO NOT rely on her for general fashion advice. Most women will naturally want to dress you up. But when you walk into the party or the bar, you want women thinking “who is that guy? I have to meet him” instead of “that guy is dressed up”. If you go shopping alone, ask nearby attractive women (not anyone who works there obviously) for advice on fit. Works as a conversation-starter too.
- Most men screw up with their shoes and jeans. Shoes always have to be clean and in good repair – it’s not a myth that women really notice this. Don’t be boring with your shoes; shoes are an easy way to express yourself without too much risk. Wear designer jeans. You won’t notice but she will. And while we’re at it, don’t tuck in your shirt. Unless you’re a body builder or something.
- Never wear to meet women what you’d wear on “business casual” day at the office. Almost by definition, if it’s good for one, it’ll be no good for the other.
The Rules of Grooming
- Precision matters. If you have sideburns, make them end in a sharp line. If you do the stubble look, make sure it has a clean, even look.
- It’s of kind like shoes – women will subconsciously make judgments from how you present yourself that can lead to unhelpful conclusions about how much you respect yourself, how you approach other areas of your life, and so on.
- Never underestimate the difference a great fashionable haircut can make. I’m not kidding. If money’s tight, splurge on an expensive designer haircut once and then get your usual guy to trim and maintain in that style.
Nick Savoy is the President of Love Systems (and joint copyright holder of The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women into Bed), the international dating experts for men. He also writes a blog, called The Real Savoy.