Opinion Openers

An opinion opener is a way of starting a conversation with a woman (or women) under the guise of getting her perspective on something. It gives you a reason to approach a woman other than just to hit on her. If you tempt her with the right topic (usually dating or relationships) her defenses will come down and she will engage in the conversation.

A lot of men would never dream of going up to a group of women and starting a conversation with them. Their first thought would be "What do I say?"

An opinion opener is a way of starting a conversation with a woman (or women) under the guise of getting her perspective on something. It gives you a reason to approach a woman other than just to hit on her. If you tempt her with the right topic (usually dating or relationships) her defenses will come down and she will engage in the conversation. Beautiful girls are rarely challenged by men to use their brains.

How do you start an opinion opener? One example of a tried and tested opinion opener is the classic "Is it wrong to end a relationship by text message?" Before you deliver your opinion opener to a group hit them first with something along the lines of "Hey guys, I want to get a female perspective on this..."

Opinion openers can be chosen before you even leave your home - there are many examples of solid, trusted ones in our Routines Manuals. Whichever you choose try to make it seem like you had a reason for asking it then and there. In the example of breaking up by text message you could tell the girl you're asking because you just got off the phone with a friend in that situation.

Alternatively, you may genuinely find a spontaneous reason to ask a girl for her opinion. For example, if your friend says his biceps are bigger than yours then by all means turn to a girl and ask her to be the judge. If you start looking for these opportunities you will be suprised at how often they come along in normal conversations with your friends.

You don't have to ask serious questions or provoke intellectual debate - in bars and clubs you can get away with just about anything as long as it's fun and playful. You can tell a girl that your mother has told you to get married and lose your virginity - ask her which you should do first.

No matter what you use to start the conversation it's vital that you use the right tone of voice and body language. Get them wrong and nothing will get you into a conversation with an attractive woman... except perhaps pity. At a minimum, stand up straight with your shoulders back but free of tension, keep good eye contact, don't fidget, and keep your head straight - not tilted to one side. Make your voice loud and clear in a way that resonates from your chest giving it a deeper, more powerful sound. There's more in-depth information about body language here.

Do these things right and an opinion opener will get you into a conversation with a girl... but it won't get you into bed with her. Once you've talked about the opener move the conversation forward to something else. A classic but fool-proof example is to ask a group "So how do you guys know each other?"

If you've never approached women in bars or clubs before then don't expect opinion openers to work out right away. Practice, learn from your mistakes and get better. "I don't know what to say" will no longer be an excuse not to speak to girls.

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