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On Fashion and Style
We want to talk about some basic fashion and style tips that will make everything you do more successful. We'll also get into lifestyle a little bit. In the past, we've been reluctant to be too detailed about this stuff. Fashion and style is one way of conveying your identity, and one of our best weapons is our ability at bootcamps to help you identify and express an identity that both fits you well and is interesting to beautiful women. However, that being said, we can definitely tell you what NOT to do, and that's a start. So, in no particular order...
We go over this stuff in intense detail at the bootcamps, but most of it is pretty individualized - it has to work for YOU. So use the above as a guide, but there is no substitute for getting advice from men who are in the game and have a great skillset. Don't go to your other frustrated friends for advice - they don't know what they are doing either. Don't rely too much on women's advice - they will try to dress you up like a Ken doll and women generally don't really know what attracts them anyway. Find the best guy you know, and ask him.
Another thing that will dramatically improve your success with women is your lifestyle. No matter how smoothly you make your way through the Triad model, you will eventually not be interesting to most women unless you have a desirable lifestyle.
Becoming very successful with women isn't an incremental process. You can't keep everything else in your life the same as it always was and expect your success with women to skyrocket once you integrate a couple of tips from us. You'll get some results, sure, but you won't get the transformation most people want. If you're not practicing, then practice. If you're not healthy, then work out. If you're not interesting, then improve yourself. All we can do is tell you how, but the execution depends on you. Invest in yourself.
No surprises here. The advanced section on a fashion and style issue HAS to be about building a strong identity.
This relates to point #3 in the section above – "Get some ornamental stuff." But it goes beyond that. A man who has a strong identity is a man who has deliberately outfitted himself with clothes, and accessories, which draw attention because they stand out. Wear at least one interesting item. They may be unfashionable. But they are unique and attention-getting. We call this "peacocking."
The term is derived from the courting rituals of the peacock. The male peacock grows an exceptionally long and colorful tail to attract a mate. The long and colorful tail is at best useless and at worst a hindrance (it gets in the way and attracts predators). What a male peacock with a great tail is communicating is "I am so good at surviving and protecting myself that I can afford the disadvantage of this tail." Female peacocks are attracted to the underlying strength of this kind of male peacock.
Similar patterns can be found in human behavior. The man driving a Ferrari communicates that he has such great access to resources that he can afford to waste some of it. The man ordering the $500 bottle of vodka at a club communicates the same thing. These displays of wealth are part of many men's courting rituals, and, because of this, are often cliched and counterproductive. Thus, while some women will be attracted to the man in the Ferrari, others will wonder if he is "compensating" or prefer a man who has enough going for him that he doesn't need to flaunt monetary wealth as a way of making a good impression on women.
Building a strong identity – the Love Systems way – is about social, not material, wealth. This is fantastically attractive to women if executed correctly. It draws attention, it demonstrates self-confidence and individuality, and it is DIFFERENT. An attractive woman in her mid-20s has probably been hit on 5000 times before you came along. Well, most of those 5000 were wearing jeans and a button down shirt. They were boring and blended in with each other. Very few were wearing leather bracelets, ornamental necklaces or something to stand out.
Having a strong visual identity is not without risks. The key question in putting together an outfit is "can you pull it off?"
Example 1: A man walks into a trendy restaurant. He is wearing a top hat, a silk vest, and shiny white shoes. Everyone looks. "Who is this guy?" He walks confidently to the bar, greets the bartender and engages in conversation with two attractive women. They respond and enjoy his company. Twenty minutes later he is seen telling a story to a small group (men and women) who are listening intently. People start to drift over to have their picture taken with him. Women start asking their dates to introduce them to him. He is always visible, always present, and he owns the social environment. He is probably able to start in qualification with any woman in the room, since they will already be attracted to him. His dress combined with his social status make people think he is a celebrity, or at least treat him as if he were one. If he can pull it off...
Example 2: A man walks into a trendy restaurant. He is wearing a top hat, a silk vest, and shiny white shoes. Everyone looks. "Who is this guy?" He walks around the area a couple of times, looking for groups to break into. Finally he engages a group of women but is blown out. Everyone notices. People start to stare and point. Some weirdo who can't dress is trying to pick up women and he looks ridiculous. After a few minutes, he no longer has a chance. Everyone has seen women reject him. No other women will be interested. His dress, combined with his lack of social status make people think he is a loser, or at least treat him as if he were one. He can’t pull it off...
As you can see, having a strong identity has a multiplying effect. The guy in Example 1 probably has the skills to attract women without it. But his decisions in his visual attire will enable him to have more choices, especially among the most attractive women. The guy in Example 2 probably wasn't going anywhere anyway. But choice of clothing ensured it. So, if you're doing well, a strong visual identity will make it a lot better, but if you're doing badly, it will make you a lot worse.
Your identity has to be different, but not weird. Dress like a celebrity, not a fool. There are no hard-and-fast rules here; it will require some fashion intuition and experience (or trial and error). But try things, experiment, and have fun!
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